To know “How to be happy?” you need to know why you are happy, and what makes you happy. It all starts with You. You need to be responsible for your own life and happiness.
A lot of people do not even really know what makes them happy or they want from others to make them happy. They just say they do not happy. To be able to feel yourself happy, first you need to get to know yourself. It will help you to understand what makes you happy, and why.
Do you know what makes you happy?
The most important question what you need to ask from yourself whether you know what makes you happy. If you have known idea what makes you happy, then you are at ground zero and you need to get to know yourself first. Start with trying out different activities, which create feelings in you and these feeling might make you happy. In order to create happiness, you need some courage to try out different things. These might make you happy and repeat them several times.
To try out things and repeat them you need to get out of your comfortzone from time to time. Create an environment or go where you like to spend your time the most. Do the activities what you like to do.
There are some steps you can take to be happy. None of them too complex to not be able to do it.
So the steps you need to take to be happy are mostly the following:
- Get to know yourself and next to this,
- Gain courage to get out of your comfortzone, and
- Try out different activities & get to know people you might be interested,
- Repeat those activities & meeting with people you like will lead to happiness.
- If you get bored, then repeat 2-4 steps by expanding your activities and people you meet. Completely replacing activities and people immediately is not always the best idea.
Step by step
1. Getting to know yourself is all about self-development and a self-discovery process, meanwhile you are realize:
- who you are?
- what you want or what are your goals?
- what do you want to reach?
2. Gaining courage is inevitable in the process. For doing something you never did or tried before need some courage. As you might face challenges, you might fail, or do not know what the consequences will be trying out things. All together you just need to gain courage to do things you have never done before, but worth to try.
3. Trying out different activities you might like is an amazing way to decide you like to do activities or not. If you tried out and did not like then you can try the next best activity, which you like better. You can make a list and compare different activities. That could help you to rank what you like to do in life.
In addition to this be selective with people.
That might sound a bit weird first, but you can’t be the best apple for people who do not like apple. In reverse you need to decide whom you would like to keep in your life close. And whom you would want to close out. If that work from the other side too properly then these create fruitful connections on the long run. There is 8 billion people on Earth you cannot match with everyone you want/like or meet. You need to find your circle. If you find your circle in your own place that is the best.
Although if you cannot find then you might need to move. Moving means change cities or countries to find what you are looking for.
4. Repeating those activities & meeting with people you like will create a kind of happiness for you. Just because these activities are what you like to do and those are the people you like to be with…
These will give you good energy and makes you happy on the long-run. Repeating things you do, and meeting with people you like should not make you bored. If it does, then you might need to expand your activities you like and people you want to meet.
5. If you get bored, expand activities you do and people you meet. Do not immediately replace them totally with new ones. Give yourself time to get used to changes, and understand what do you like to do and whom do you like to meet or not.
How to maintain interest and not get bored?
To understand why we get bored, we need to know what boredom is.
What is boredom?
According to the American Psychological Association (APA) dictionary boredom is the “state of weariness. Or ennui resulting from a lack of engagement with stimuli in the environment. Generally considered to be one of the least desirable conditions of daily life. Often identified by individuals as a cause of feeling depressed. It can be seen as the opposite of interest and surprise.”
What is interest?
Interest is “an attitude characterized by a need or desire to give selective attention to something that is significant to the individual. Such as an activity, goal, or research area.” according to APA.
To be able to maintain interest & passion several times you need to
- know why you are doing what you are doing, and
- sometimes seperate yourself from your beloved activity.
Maintaining interest is not exactly means you need to do the activities you like all day 24/7. Or being with the people you like to be with. Maintaining interest means sometimes you need to seperate yourself fully from activities you like or people you like to meet.
- getting out to the nature is a good idea if your interest is mostly inside or technology related;
- if you are busy with people, then try to be not around people in your free time, or
- if you do everything alone, then you need to get around people when you are not doing your interest.
What makes you happy will make you happy on the long run only if you give yourself time to recharge. You need to find our what might drain your energy and find solutions to maintain interest or passion.
- if you are a great writer, but you hate to write e-mails, then find someone who write e-mails for you or doing the marketing, or
- if you are a great event organizer, but hate to do administration, then find someone who is doing the administration.
How to maintain interest and passion?
To be able to maintain interest and passion and not to get bored, you need to find pain points, which are pain points for you and solve them for yourself.
If you get bored fast, that does not mean that you need to just give up everything, because what is the guarantee that your new shiny activity will be shiny and new forever?
Nothing at all.
You will get bored with your new activity after a while and you need to find a new one. That is a repetition too what will lead to boredom after a while again.
What will you do when you get bored with finding out new activities?
Getting to know yourself, activities and people better
I do not say do not get to know new people all the time and finding out and trying new activities all the time, but this is not the only option.
Give people and activities time
Just because you are replacing activities, and people all the time in your life, or quite frequently, that does not guarantee your life will be better on the long-run. Sometimes personal relationships and connections will be strong or stronger with time, because people fight for those relationships and nurture them, not just abandon and replace them anytime they feel like or when a little problem emerge.
(Obviously I do not say be with people whom you do not want anymore, or do things you do not feel like, but in some cases it is better if you do not replace them immediately. Instead of replacing just try to learn more about yourself, and the activities you are doing or the connections you have and how to make them better.)
Boredom can be a solution
In a study: Why Being Bored Might Not Be a Bad Thing after All, which published in 2017 in the journal Academy of Management Discoveries, researchers found that boredom can spark individual productivity & creativity.
The study is about people who had gone through a boredom-inducing task (sorting a bowl of beans by color, one by one). Those who were bored later performed better on an idea-generating task than people who were not bored. It was to come up with excuses for being late that wouldn’t make someone look bad. Bored folks outperformed artists both in terms of idea quantity and quality. It ranked by objective outsiders who assigned uniqueness scores to each other.
There are options, when you do not need to get into new activities all the time. If you are creative enough, then you will be able to find out how to make the old activity seems like new, you will understand yourself better doing that activity several times, and you will be able to expand your interest in one activity.
How to be happier?
If your life usually happy, but you have a hard or difficult time just now and this is more like a temporary situation for you then here are some advice how to be happier….
Reduce and manage stress in your life for example learn time management techniques. Enjoy your time and yourself, so all in all do things you love, and do not listen to people who want to tell you what you should do instead do the things, which makes you happy. Simple activities like watching sports with friends, having a hot bath, or meeting with friends for a cup of coffee can improve your day.
Self-esteem is important, so watch your thoughts and keep your thoughts happy, by telling something bright to yourself instead of putting down your self-esteem. Do sport or go to the gym.
Have a healthy lifestyle that can help you to boost your self-esteem and your self-confidence too. For example do not drink too much alcohol, have a well-balanced diet, drink enough water, do exercises, or walk, sleep enough etc.
Communication is important so talk and share. It helps to relieve tension, which strengthen connections with people. Talking to friends will help you to clarify things and sometimes you can get new perspectives and advice, which might help you to find a solutions faster. You definitely need some friends to be able to share.
Build resilience by being creative, do activities like writing, drawing, painting, singing, or dancing with your friends in a party, or trying out a new rollercoaster, which can help you through difficult times, when you might would think in a negative way.
be curious, go and have fun, the most important to have fun even if you feel like nothing goes in the way you want them to go.
Have fun like
- try a new restaurant,
- meet with a new date,
- have a trip somewhere you have never been to, or
- travel to a country you have never been to, or
- go to party and dance as it will relieve a lot of tension, make you happy, boast self-confidence and help you to keep up your good mood and be able to be happy, when you would not be that happy.
New Years Eve 2023
For New Years Eve highly recommended to go to party even if you do not go anywhere at least try to go out in that evening. This is the day of the parties 🥳 🎉.
- meeting with friends, and going out,
- go to a restaurant and a party,
- travel to another country and use all-inclusive hotels,
- try eco-friendly hotels,
- try another country’s New Year’s Eve etc.
Most importantly have fun and enjoy your night.
Happy New Year to all of our Readers!